Failure is an option
Failure is the key to success; each mistake teaches us something. — Morihei Ueshiba
I want to change something that has been hard coded into my mind from childhood.
Failure != Bad
Failure is bad! That's what general public thinks. That's what I think/feel. But I'm starting to think that this widely accepted fact is in fact not true and maybe even quite the opposite.
To understand why almost everyone hates to fail, I had to do a little bit of thinking and finally realized this:
We hate to fail because it hurts!
Usually I either give up right before it happens (or I think it might happen) or blame it on someone or something, when it does happen. And, it's all because failure hurts soo much!
Failure is always a very high possibility for everything we do. And by trying to avoid it, we basically avoid doing anything meaningful!
I argue that almost all the things that are "safe" (with low risk of failing) are usually not worth doing!
Do you know what it means if I'm right about that?
It means, the more often and the harder your failures the bigger you are as a person.
Check this out: Three Times Elon Musk Failed Harder Than You Ever Will
It's not just Elon Musk, this is the case for every acopmlished person in history (they have failed many times and sometimes very badly). Sadly, the media only focuses on their sucess which further frightens people of failure.
I spend all my energy trying to avoid failure. All the planning, thinking, pretending and more. And I'm also constantly afraid of the day that I might fail!
Failure is like this giant monster that is lurking in my subconscious mind eating my only source of energy — courage. This monster does not care about me or the subject that I fail at. It's one evil monster that almost never attacks but constantly threatens.
Who created this monster?
Because, I'm not brave enough (I'm a coward).
Here is dictionary definition for "brave"
brave brāv/￼ adjective Ready to face and endure danger or pain; showing courage.
I'm starting to embrace failure as a viable outcome of my goals/dreams/objectives, small to big. I am trying to do what I do for the sake of doing and not because I don't want to fail.
This is only easy to say. The monster is huge and is the source of all my issues. To eliminate the monster I have come up with the following rules:
- Think of failure as a good thing! — without it we would never learn/grow.
- Think about failing — try not to think about preventing it! Just think about failing!
- Deliberately fail at something that frightens you.
- Thinking about time/death — time will eventually resolve all the problems by rendering them insignificant.
I have started to do more! Not only that, I'm much happier.
I definitely suggest you to think of failure as a viable option and embrace it as a good thing.
I would like to thank my brother Amin https://twitter.com/@seyediA who got me thinking about this subject.